I'd Be Lying
by supernaturalsammy67
Summary: You need a hand sometimes. Dean knows. Dark, season 5.


**This is just a tear jerker, or it was for me. And I thought this song was...poof. Winchester style.**

**Song is I'd be lying by Greg Laswell **

**And here's the lyrics, have a listen if you can. Spot the brotheryness, for some reason it reminded me of Sam anyway. As most things do...mmm.**

**Summary: You need a hand sometimes. Dean knows. Dark, season 5. Tissues!**

**Warning: I'm a mope and I just cried for a full day in drama rehearsals so forgive my sudden expel of grief.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them, I have to fight tooth and nail to keep what I have and I'm terrified of losing her someday, it actually freaks me out royally. Mums x**

_Won't you let me give you a hand  
I have an extra I'm not using  
won't you let me lighten your load  
I mean after all your legs are shaking  
_

"Sammy" Dean said, sombre, toneless. The way it was these days. They hadn't spoken, hadn't looked at each other for days.

Dean gripped the phone tighter in his palm, it was warm, sweaty. Not cool, not calm like his usual self.

He could hear hitched breaths on the other end, a little static as his brother moved.

"Where are you?" He showed little concern these days but his heart still beat him to it with worry, always for Sammy.

The breath hitched again, more silence and then finally an exhale. "Don't, don't come for me"

It was whispered, drained, thick and tight closing in Sam's throat, preventing him from saying anymore, he _didn't _want to but he knew he had to, it wasn't right anymore.

"Sam, where?" Sterner. John-like. Dean demanded and he rarely asked that of Sam these days too.

Sam swallowed thickly on the line. "I can't" He breathed.

Dean's eyebrows came together as a frown marred his features. "Are you...-"

"I'm fine. I'm fine, Dean please don't come for me" It was said in a rush, a blurt of speech so fast Sam was almost panting and Dean's heart played a faster rhythm.

Dean waited a moment, assess and plan. Except he didn't know what was going on with his brother and he didn't know how to reach out, how to help or what to do anymore.

"Why?" He suddenly asked. And he actually heard Sam stop, heard his chest stop- mid inhale, felt his eyes drop to a stare and his heart stutter.

And then he heard the dial tone like a flat line and he flashed back to the hospital.

"_We were just starting to be brothers again"_

Curse that damn reaper for showing him that. He still had dreams from her memories magically downloaded back into his head, how fragile and hurt Sam always looked then. Little Sammy.

His brother sounded a lot like that now, confused, hurt, desperate. And a whole bucket of other emotions swirling round in that geek head of his.

Dean did something different next. He re-dialled.

_And I can understand  
All I need is your hand  
Oh won't you take the fall  
It is me after all_

"Sam. I want an answer..." He wasn't mad and he knew he didn't sound it because his heart was jack hammering and worry from nowhere was suddenly sprouting up and clenching his guts.

"Dean..." And Dean swore he heard Sam crying, heard his little brothers tears fall as loud as a bang on the door and he blinked at the strange wetness in his own eyes.

"Please Sam, just tell me where"

And Sam did.

_  
Won't you let me match your stride  
I can slow down if you want to  
We can handle it side by side  
What do you say don't you want to_

"I think you know why I came Sam"

The motel was cheap, filthy, in the middle of nowhere-ville and about as far as Sam would never be, and yet he was right there, red eyed and shaking, sat on the bed.

"Just get it over with then" Again, the thick tight voice. Another tear fell and Sam quickly swiped at his dripping down his jaw, set hurt eyes to Dean.

"What?" Dean was frowning, feeling something he hadn't in a long time and he felt the need to be right beside Sam, to hold him but his mind was screaming no! No! NO!

Sam gasped out a laugh, a twisted broken smile that snapped Dean's heart when he saw Sam's eyes shed again.

"You know...the gun, the knife, poison...it's your method you should have picked" Sam sniffed, added quietly. "Unless you want to try them all"

Now Dean was downright frowning, walking closer to Sam and he swore he saw the kid stiffen, flinch even.

"Sam? What's going on?"

Terrified eyes looked to Dean. "You're here to kill me, right?...so go ahead. I won't even put up a fight"

Dean growled deep in his chest, fucking jumped so fast towards his little brother he felt the carpet shift and he grabbed Sam's arms, pushed him with a solid shove back and pinned him to the bed, arms above his head.

Sam barely muffled his fears, Dean could hear his heartbeat from where he stood, could see the shivers wracking his brothers form and the breaths that jutted his chest with sharp panicked breaths. His eyes were wide with hurt, tears trickling down the sides of his face.

He was right, he didn't even put up a fight.

Dean let him go, another growl, this time at the back of his throat. "You idiot" He spat, all high rage and releasing.

Sam was wide eyed confusion staring up, too scared to move, to speak.

"You think I want to kill you!" Dean yelled and now he really was starting to feel something and he let it ride him out, he was pretty sure he'd bitten Sam's head off before about something like this...he followed the memory, felt a piece of himself change. He knew that Sam.

"_As long as I'm around nothing bad is gonna' happen to you"_

"_Please, kill me...Dean, you'd be doing me a favour" _

He remembered holding the gun, the cold bite of its metal.

And looking at his baby brother, soul and heart bared on his sleeve, bleeding like a nicked artery before him, he realised. He knew this Sam too, the times had just gotten darker.

"I told you before. I'd rather die Sammy...and I'm still going to save you"

Sam blinked.

And Dean held out his hand, waiting.

__

And I can understand  
All I need is your hand  
Oh won't you take the fall  
It is me after all

I'd be lying  
If I ran away  
I'd be lying  
If I ran another way

And so I'll stay  


It'd been two days since Sam's streak of...well a pretty big breakdown they were thinking of, but they'd been talking and Sam was still all _sorrysorryGodI'msorry _but he was handling himself fine, and Dean...well, he was speaking to Sam on brotherly terms, chewing him out and taking the piss.

And it felt good.

_  
But won't you let me be your man  
I'm strong enough you know that I can  
Be the one to ease your mind  
Ease your mind_

Sam wasn't talking about Ruby, or the Devil or any of that business but still every other word was sorry. Come to think of it, Sam wasn't saying much at all about why he'd freaked, why he'd been so scared he'd up and literally run away from Dean, middle of the night.

It wasn't until the fifth day, Dean was innocently talking about Sam's too long hair, his kick ass music and poof. Sam had clammed open instead of up and he'd spilled his guts, the more sinister side Dean hadn't seen.

__

And I can understand  
All I need is your hand  
Oh won't you take the fall  
It is me after all

Sam was looking at him, scared, trusting, confused-again, and beyond all just trying to get through his sentence without choking.

"Why I left...I dreamt it...all of it, you were coming to kill me, you'd already tried and you found me again so easily"

"Why did I want to kill you?" Dean said slowly.

Sam wasn't looking at him, but he was doing something...old and warming. He was looking up to Dean again.

"I never told you..." Sam breathed. "I thought about what he said. To me...the choice"

Neither brother spoke for a tense moment and Sam had that I'm-gonna-scarper-look again.

"I nearly said yes..."Sam clamped his mouth shut, sure he was going to get it full of fist but Dean didn't move or flinch, his eyes simply creased and he blinked, once, twice.

"He know that?"

"It came pretty close" Sam swallowed. "I think he knew...yeah"

_  
I'd be lying  
If I ran another way  
I'd be lying  
If I ran another way  
And so I'll stay_

"Good" Dean huffed, no anger, no sighing, no sharpening his blade to use on Sam later.

Sam was reeling. "Good? I nearly let the devil ride my body and destroy the whole world Dean! You would've have to kill me to stop me, how is that- why are you smiling?"

Dean twitched his lips, ran his tongue over his bottom lip. "You sound terrified you almost did that Sam, you sound...ashamed..."

Sam gaped, blinking at Dean's reaction.

"YES! Of course..."

"Then what's wrong? What are you apologising for that you haven't done and you know you're not going to?"

Sam blinked. _Oh....oh. _He didn't have an answer to that, actually.

_Won't you let me give you a hand  
I have an extra I'm not using  
Won't you let me lighten your load  
I mean after all your legs are shaking_

"Sam, you were drowning. You...we both were and something pops up, offers an end to all our pain, all our past. No more deals, no more heartache and no more fighting...I'd take its offer"

"But-"

"You didn't say yes, and you won't"

Sam narrowed his eyes. "I'm not trying to pick a fight, honest...but...how come you're suddenly on my side, the last time we were together..." _You never wanted to see me again._

__

And I can understand  
All I need is your hand  
Oh won't you take the fall  
It is me after all

"Well..." Dean leant forward, gazing strongly at Sam. "I remembered a few things..." He gave a small smile to himself.

__

There's not much that you can do  
To get me to run away from you

"Like what?" Sam asked, his eyes glazing with moisture.

__

I'd be lying  
If I ran away  
I'd be lying  
If I ran another away

"That we were brothers. And I haven't been acting my part...neither have you" Dean gave but a tug of a smile on his lips and extended his hand to his brother.

"Thanks" Sam said thickly, a heart felt thickly. "Brother"

Sure they had problems, and it wouldn't be Winchester nature if they didn't have it out with each other every now and again, and giving in to a cheap Angel-Demon fight-off was not in the Winchester way.

**The end. **


End file.
